Guaranteed Freshness

I'm not sure who was in the closet with the washer and dryer last, but when I opened the door this morning to do a load of laundry the bottle of fabric softener fell, UPSIDE DOWN (did I mention it had no lid on) and wedged between the door and washer. I won't bore you with the details on how I got it out but let's just say it involved me upside down, with a broom and alot of cursing. Now we have no fabric softener and the laundry is going to be rough and stinky. But my carpet is "Suddenly Spring".

It was you wasn't it?

Is there a doctor in the house?

So I'm laying with DH and B last night before bed and B turns around, says "Awwwwww" and jumps on me. With his big ol head. Smacked me directly in the nose... so of course I'm bleeding and crying. (T is not surprised by me crying) Now this morning I have a killer headache and a black eye and my nose is making these weird clicking sounds. And it's stuffy. I feel that burning-I-need-to-sneeze thing too.

I can cry if I want to

It's my birthday May 7th... think I can get a ticket home???

So embarrassing

As the dance I was doing to the Ninja Turtles theme song reached a fevered pitch in my bedroom, I noticed my 6 year old son looking at me. It was then I saw the look in his eyes was, in fact, NOT admiration.

I Do Not Love My Dog

I do not love my dog
He bites and poops and pees

I do not love my dog
He always barks at me

I do not love my dog
He chews up all my things

I do not love my dog
I'd like to give his neck a wring

I do not love my dog
He should find a home that's new

I do not love my dog
I do not want him here
Do you?

Poem by Me

Oh.My.Goodness.

Chomp.Scrape.Scratch.Scratch.

I lift my head up, eyeball the clock. It's 4:30 a.m. and something had woken me up...

Chomp.Scrape.Scratch.Scratch.

WTF? Is that the fucking dog chewing the door?

Rustle.Rustle.
Chomp.Scrape.Scratch.Scratch.

No, it's coming from the kitchen... did the dog get out of the bathroom and into the kitchen somehow.

Bark.Bark.

NO, that's the dog, coming from the bathroom. WHAT THE HELL IS IN THE KITCHEN?

Shake DH, make him go see.

LMAO Dh goes strolling manfully into the kitchen, with my broom LMFAO How brave.

Chomp.Scrape.Scratch.Scratch.

It's coming from under the sink... DH flips on the light and it stops.

But...once he opens the cupboard door we see there is a gigantic hole in the back wall under my kitchen sink with a bunch of shavings around it....

OMG. If you only knew how completley horrified I am at the idea of a MOUSE. OMG We will move tomorrow if I find out it's a mouse.

I finally drift off to sleep around 5:30 a.m. only to dream about a terrible mouse and the havoc it will wreak on my home and sanity. Because it is of course a mouse and of course evil.

Thank goodness we live in an apartment stll, the maintainence guy came and put some foamy stuff in the hole and left. He says it was probably a squirrel...

***hoping it was just a squirrel**

Faithful Defenders?

Yes this is the name of a Judas Priest cover band... and yes that is my father doing lead vocals. Enjoy! The band artwork in this blog was done by me and will be their CD cover! I want royalties!

Do do do lookin out my back door

Yeah so what if I like CCR? Here are some pics. Shush.

Are we there yet?

I was waiting until I felt a little better to post again. Of course I don't. LOL Crap I haven't felt this awful since I was 13 and listening to Nine Inch Nails in the dark... And of course the fact that it's Easter this weekend doesn't help. We used to have an egg hunt with my mom and of course dinner together, not to mention church in the morning. I miss my family...

Signed the dog up for obedience classes today. Hopefully the f-ing dog will learn something and therefore get to keep his stupid teeth. I am not a dog person and this puppy is really pushing me to the edge of sanity. I caught him chewing on my favorite XOXO purse last night. Fucker. It seems to be ok, but dammit. Idiot dog. I buy him toys...

I've been wanting to take pics of my new surrounding but its been raining raining raining again. Hopefully it clears up for a few hours and I'll snap a pic or 12.

I met with the our Real Estate agent yesterday. Yapped with her about what we want, what we will accept and what will just not fly. She took me to see the weirdest house ever. Seriously the house was set up so oddly, it made no sense. Like a huge window in the master bedroom with a great view of the.. garage? And the washer/dryer in the kitchen with a super tiny back room left empty? and it was small. 1000 square feet? Too small. We'll be going out tomorrow to look some more. I have a few months left here on my lease so we are really in no rush. Which is good because I am feeling picky and hard to please lately.

Wild Mood Swings

Not just one of my favorite Cure Album but also a good description of how I feel today. I'm sick. F-ing Pacific North WET. I think my oldest is sick, either that or he is about to morph into a gremlin. I'm not hungry, good thing because I still haven't been shopping. Oops. And I think I'm taking too many painkillers. But WTH. I don't feel good and I want to go home. I know, I said the other day I was getting used to the idea of living here, didn't you read the title of my post. Sheesh. I hate the rain. I hate the lack of ANYTHING to do. There isn't even a drive thru donut shop here for craps sake. I can name 3 back home. Within 1 mile of my house. What's that you say? Donuts are unhealthy? Well so is my f-ing attitude when I haven't had my sugar fix, so now what? And DH has cut off my $9.00 a day Starbucks hit. "Just for now" I need that Starbucks because I'm pretty sure the 2 Red Bulls I've been drinking everyday for 3 years have given me an ulcer.

Oh Happy Day

Our moving reimbursement money finally came in!!!!!! Yes! I'm not (as) poor anymore. We can actually go grocery shopping, things are really coming together. Now if only I didn't have to watch Barney at 7:30 a.m..... oh well can't have it all.

I learned a few new words the other day in chat. Yeah, I know, go figure. It also figures considering *who* I was chatting with. (Hiiiii FU,Kitty) But I now have the name "dink" on G2. Hilarious. Actually the word dink is hilarious if you don't know what it means. Cute-ish. Not so much once you look it up . Hmmmm. I'm still LMAO because that's just who I am. A smart girl with a rockin sense of humor. Either that or I've learned not to fight the Kitty. You decide!

Our weekend

Yesterday was really nice here! Sunny-ish. We had a great weekend, went to the Science Center with DH and the kids. The kids had so much fun there, it's a really cool place. I liked the Naked Mole Rats best. LOL We were supposed to have lunch with a friend (Sorry D) but we ended up getting lost trying to drive home. If I had known where we were (i.e. seen a street sign ANYWHERE) I would have called said friend for directions. I suck.

In any event it was nice to get out of the house and do something beyond picking up milk and diapers. :o)

On a side note I am really hating this On Demand crap with our cable. I mean, is it really necessary to have Teletubbies ON DEMAND? Because my 2 year old is demanding it CONSTANTLY. And Barney. Good grief. Barney!

I'm doing a little bit better with the homesickness. As usual, the girls in the Garden were right. We went shopping and got some pots/pans, a vacuum, broom, food and other misc household things and *whew* I feel alot better. My 6 year old is on Spring Break and Dh took the car and I don't feel like having a panic attack! Yay! Progress! I also managed to pick up a copy of the Sims 2 from Best Buy for $29.99 so I have been doing that while the kids are napping. I love my Sims ;0) Hey if I can't control my own life, at least I can control something else. It's either playing the Sims or going totally batty.

I feel more like an actual human being today.